passion and heartache 2- caves of the heart 1

2

​

As mentioned above, Inu happily read an email from Helena, who had kept silence for a long time. It said she was stepping again to the guitar rhythm in order to overcome her sorrow caused by the shocking news of Enricho Morente's sudden death. one of her favorite flamenco singers. It was at the time when his interest in her was getting gradually weak that she sent the email to him. He was greatly amazed at it. Most of all, his eyes were seized by the striking message saying that She did pick out the flamenco shoes left in the shoe-keeping closet!

A few days after Inu read the emails from Helena , he happened to meet his 2 close friend out to make a good dinner with some cups of soju , In the restaurant one of them suggested to Inu an idea that they should have a meaningful concert cherishing the memory of Kim yong shil, a high school classmate of Inu's and the deceased young hero of the Masan 3.15 Resistance Movement, in 1960. And the he reminded Inu of the flamenco show performed in Masan a few years before. Indeed then Inu had played a leading role for it with Helena and her flamenco team invited by himself.

Next day he emailed about it to Helena..

​Dec. 16, 2010

Helena!

Hola!!

I am writing this email to inform you of a meaningful message for you. Great you started to practice dancing. How glad I was to read it! So I came to send this message with a big expection too full for words.

Right now an urgent question- Could you dance as you used to do? Would you fly here in a few months for your concert?

Unexpectedly there happened a thing special to me. It was directly related with no other than you. Yesterday 3 friends of mine had a dinner meeting to see the old year out, where one of them proposed an idea that we have a flamenco performance held to cherish the memory of Kim Yong Shil, the deceased young hero of 315 Resistance Uprising of 1960 year. I and the others on the spot agreed to support the idea , because everyone of them remember very well you and the flamenco show you performed here a few years ago.

For your information, The hero was shot to death in the middle of March by the police as a high shool boy joining the anti-dictatorship demo 50 years ago. The deceased has been alive in our minds him as a gentle chivalrous-spirited class leader.

Waiting for your reply,

Love

Inu

​

Dec. 17, 2010

Dear Inu:

is it true? Amazing !!

You have renewed my hope in life, in Flamenco. I will try by dancing with every ounce of soul I have.Let me know about it in detail . Please don't worry about the performing expenses.

Love

Helena.

​

Dec. 18, 2010

Helena.

Very good.

The brief outline of my idea in relation with it:

1 ) Approximate program as indicated below

2 ) The freight and fee for you to be paid by Inu.

( If under the amount of 2,000- for the freight and fee for you, I think I can do it on my own responsibility).

Other expenditures for the performance covered by personal contributions.

3 ) Date: 1st half March, 2011( within the 14th)

4 ) Place: Changdong Hall with 100 seats in the downtown of Masan

*Program

title: Night of Famenco

-cherishing the memory of Kim Yong sHIL, the deceased hero of 315 Resistance Movement-

Prologue

1st: Solo solea of resistance

Motive: Morning Dew

Bailaora: Helena

with Bob, guitarist accompanying Helena

2nd: Solo sigueilla of lamentation

Motive: Back to Heaven

Bailaora: Helena

with Bob

3rd: Solo salpuri dance

Motive: Back to Heaven

Dancer: A Korean traditional dancer

with Korean traditional musical instruments accompanying her

4th: saxophone duo

motive: the deceased' school song

saxophonist, a high shool friend of the deceased

5th:Solo alegrias of light and shadow

Motive: A poem of Garcia Lorca

Balaora: Helena with Bob

Epilogue

This is just a step for my idea. It is of course unavailable without your full approval to it. In this relation no other bailaora can do it in place of you, who understands the Korean culture of resistance and sorrow. And I wish I could invite you together with Bob Pergerson. This time especially the most important thing is to minimise the expenditure , because for the time being .I cannot find out any practical sponsorship for it

Pls reply soonest,

in love of You and flamenco,

Inu

​

Dec 19. 2010

Dear Inu

I am delighted to dance to recorded music for many reasons and I would like to bring my assistant at no cost to anyone!

I have so many ideas, so many that will be easy to do and not cost anything but make the evening so special and honor your dear friend and Flamencos we have lost.

Here are a few ideas I have about the performance!

1. I would very much like to dance to an Enrique Morente piece to honor him. He was one of the first, if not the first, Flamenco artist to experiment with different cultures and sounds. He very much inspired me to do all that I have done, including Morning Dew.

2. Is it possible to have a screen behind me (the theatre may have one).

All I would need is the screen. This time I would rather dance with no accompanists.

I am in better shape than ever and ready to dance.

Love,

Elena

​

Dec. ? 2010

Hi, Helena,

Ok. Pls let me kow in detail how to set the screen behind you.

Will try to follow your idea of it.

Can I do it simply without any technical difficulty?

Another Bailaora? It's Good.

Then what role do you help the bailora to act on our performance?

She can do cante or palmas?

I will persuade my team to accept the idea of inviting another bailaora.

And I hope that Bob, the guitarist will sure come over together with you.

Love

Inu

​

Dec 19, 2010

Dear Inu:

I think that the performance to recorded music will be just fine and in some ways better as it can incorporate all of the aspects of Flamenco: cante, guitarra, cajon, etc, along with my baile. one of my many frustrations with the Flamenco artists here is their greed. Dancing to some profound music of great artists will enable me to express history, future of Flamenco, and Flamenco infused with Moorish tones, which is the root. I would much rather create a screen show behind me than bring another artist. I think it will lead everyone on a wonderful journey filled with incredible visions of Flamenco, art, and Spain.

what do you think?

love,

Helena

​

​

Dec. 23, 2010

Dear Helena:

Re the late bailaor and cantaor,

the master of the performance or me is going to interpret your deep sorrow ｅxpression at an appropriate moment on the stage.

How do you think about the idea?

One question.-Could be there a flamenco artist( he or she) at your side

who want to fly ( I will pay the the ticket )to accompany you?

In pondering about the better program,

Inu

​

Inu was very nervous that it was 7 days or more since there were not an email any more from her. Strangely enough, she abruptly stopped emailing to him. Now it was already in the second half of the month of Feb. He should get everything for the march performance prepared in detail until the end of Feb. He was very uneasy mummering " why she keeps silent?"

At the right moment when Inu grew more and more anxious , a new email came. Then it was not from her but Marsha, flamenco dancer in Jerez of Spain who had taught Helena . She was familar to Inu because he had met her in Jerez on his journey to Spain and she had once had a chance to drop in Masan as a sightseening tourist. Why Marisha to me? Why Her email here on this day of all days? Inu felt very uneasy at her unexpected email. As feared, it was here to say about exactly what happened to Helena. The message as follows:

Jan. 14 2011

My Dearest Inu,

I write to you on behalf of Lorena. She has asked me to write you

because she is having some very, very difficult moments of coherence.

she is not doing very well, and as I understand she will not be able

to go to Korea. She feels terrible about this because she truly

thought she would be able to make it and knew it would be a great

experience for her to go away from very much pain she has in heart

right now. But unfortunately, her physical health is not responding to

her necessary level to do a good job for you. She has had so many

losses, first the adotion, her mother, and last her marriage. She is

on various medications for different problems.

My heart is very heavy for her. I care for her very deeply as I know

you always have. I hope you understand the situation.

If there are some words of your wisdom you can share wth her, I think

she would appreciate it immensely, she needs all the love and support

that her firends can offer.

Please let me know if there is anything I can do for your project, if

it is in my capacity, I will be happy to help you.

I send my very best to you and hold very fond memories of my trip to

Korea and the moments with you and your friends....I still remember

the time your docotor friend played that incredible music for us!

All the best dear Joon,

Marsha

​

Following that successfully at last did arrive Helena's email . As feared, it was a kind of excuse on her cancellation. It as as follows:

​

Jan. 16.2011

Dear Inu:

I have made the very difficult decision that I cannot come to Korea at this time. This has nothing to do with money, it has to do with the very poor mental state I am in. The divorce with Juan has affected me in ways I cannot imagine, you cannot imagine, and I plan to enter the hospital for care very soon- perhaps today.

Every day I feel differently, either strong or weak to the point of collapse. I am on 8 medications to help with everything from sleep to kidney problems because I cannot eat properly.

I feel that I will embarrass you more by arriving in a weakened state and not being able to function as a person or a bailaora.

I cannot express in words alone how awful I feel and I understand if you never speak with me again. I have been lying to myself that I could find the courage and strength to dance again in public, but I cannot even leave my home without unbelievable anxiety and fear. I have tried to gain the confidence from you, from Maria, from therapy, but I can't find it.

I do not know how to express this any better than this. I am no longer the person you remember. I am a sad, depressed, scared shell of what I used to be. Between the loss of my daughter and my husband I can barely leave my bed. Many days I do not wish to live.

I have tried to convince myself otherwise. I have spent the past days in agony of this decision. But I cannot physically or mentally do something I am not capable of.

I will always love you, and the people of Korea, and ask for God's forgiveness as well as yours. I do not expect it, I just beg for it.

Love

Helena

The surprising messages from the two trapped him in such a circumstance as he could not go onward any more or turn back. As matter of fact, the flamenco show project began with an idea that Helena in Portland should be as the main performer for it. Now she was sure to be absent. on the other hand it was unthinkable for him to stop the project in prgress.

For a while he wasin despair at a loss what to do. However he should grope for a way to breakthrough the dead end. It was to find out a Korean dancer who would replace Helena. In the beginning he never had such an alternative idea , for he had thought of no other dancer in this case with the exception of Helena. So he could not but to decide that he should find out a flamenco dancer in Seoul , and immediately contact he. Nadine was her, who was unknown to him.

Feb., 21, 20 11

Dear Nadyne:

I could be there today at your studio in Sungsu-Dong today.

In relation with the performance program sent to you by email yesterday,

I would like to suggest that you sure come to Masan to dance.

And also I would like to talk about every expense including the guarrantee for you.

May I meet you within 2 pm, today?

Fyi, Today before noon I am due to arrive at Seoul by train

Will call you as soon as I arrive at the Seoul Station.

​

Feb.​22일

Hello, Nadyne:

Wonderful images of you in the pamphlet!

The 3rd one was the best of all.

I would like to put it on the advertising poster for our performace.

I need the images of the other 2 performer to come with you for the pamphlet ready to be printed.

And dont forget to attach their personal records in brief.

Regarding the sound facility engineer you inquired about,

as soon as we employ any engineer, will let him contact you by phone.

Refering the flamenco part of the stage, you would be the key performer for it

And pls prepare a short item for encore request in advance ,

Any question?

Inu

​

Feb,. 29

Hi, Nadyne:

Needless to say, this stage of this performance is to unfold on you as the central axis. Especially the flamenco part of it would be absolutely up to you.

Please dont forget that you would be the key performer for ' Night of Flamenco' What is most important would be your intuition and emotonal stream on your stage .

For the whole concept for it will inform you of it. It will be soon framed, as the planning member has been talking about it with other performers .

Dont worry about the process on the stage

Inu

​

March. ​3월 7, 2011​

Dear nadyne:

Everything is almost ready!

Now the big problem to solve is that how many audience would come .

a) refering the sheet of plywood of 2meter by 1 meter you requested for is prepared. It will be put on the stage floor when your stage begin.

b) as for the 3 flamenco items misprinted in the pamphlet,

the stage master will refer to the items on the stage in progress in detail. That is to say, he will introduce the 2 items of your first and second stage as baile jondo and the last one as baile intermedio. Okay?

c) we want to have lunch together the 3 peformers due to arrive by noon, 11th of March at the Masan by train. Okay?

d) the departure tickets after the performance( Ktx or Highway bus) will be purchased in advance. Okay?

And in case of returning home It will be up to you whether to leave right after the performance or the next day .2 Hotel rooms for you will be reserved, if you stay at the night here.

*We'd like to advise you that you and the 2 performers stay the night here . Any question?

Please reply soonest.

Thanks a lot.

Inu

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